Drill - How to Tie Your Shoelaces (or: the extraordinarily mundane act that will improve your shibari)
Serialized exclusive excerpt of Midori’s new rope bondage book in progress, only at Twisted Monk and Midori’s Patreon
By Midori
www.planetmidori.com
An exercise in sequence. This is not a speed drill. It’s better if you slow down and notice the process. Take your leisurely time.
You will need:
1. Solo:
2. Solo:
3. Pair:
4. Pair:
5. Pair:
6. Solo:
7. Pair:
8. Pair:
For many of my rope classes, the prerequisite skill list includes “be able to tie your shoelaces.” People think I’m just being goofy or trite. Goofy? Yes, because this is all about play and joy – which is ultimately a very serious matter. Trite? No. The art of tying one’s shoes is actually a very complex set of skills. If you’ve taught a child how to tie shoes, you know. Hands must move in bilateral mirror image. Fingers move in small precise movements as the hands move on a slightly larger scale. The foot must sense for the right tightness with hands responding and adjusting simultaneously. All the while there is a three-dimensional model in the brain of what’s happening and what needs to happen. The fingers and hands need to adjust tension as needed. When the linguistic parts of the brain are engaged, another layer of information to process is added – perhaps you’re listening to verbal instructions, or silently talking oneself through the procedure. For people who experience challenges or frustration with words-to-action, they know this complexity very well. The same for people with challenges around dexterity, mobility limitations, and visualization-to-movement translation. They know well already that this “simple” skill is hardly simple.
As you go through the shoelace steps, slow down and notice the minute and layered process needed. Notice the movement of your hands, fingers, arms, and even your body and spine relative to the laces.
Then, can you make your movements more fluid? More efficient? More dramatic? Gentler? Rougher? Sexier? Creepier? Subtler? Funnier?
What if you removed the shoe and used very long laces on the bare foot? Criss-cross wrap around the foot instead of using the holes in the shoes.
Pay attention. Try the moods listed above.
What if you did this on the bare leg up to the knee?
Try both feet and legs together.
Finish it off with a nice bow!
----
Art by Nadia Vanilla www.nadiavanilla.com
Nadia Vanilla is an award-winning Phoenix-based erotic artist. She paints people of all walks of life, doing all sorts of fun things with their bodies. She aims to celebrate the human experience, in all its messy, colorful beauty.
She uses a variety of media to achieve this – lately, that includes digital painting and drawing, soft pastels, acrylic paints, watercolors, and ink.
----
Midori's Bio
Trailblazing educator, sexologist, artist, and irritant to banality, Midori founded Rope Dojo and ForteFemme: Women's Dominance Intensive. She penned the first English instruction book on Shibari titled, "Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage" in 2001, paving the way to the popularity of rope. Dan Savage calls her the "Super Nova of Kink," while others affectionately call her Auntie Midori for her cool, tell-it-like-it-is, funny, reality-based teaching. She is also the author of "Wild Side Sex," "Master Han's Daughter," and "Silk Threads.”
During this pandemic, learn, laugh and enjoy her special online classes, events and art at www.patreon.com/PlanetMidori
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/planetmidori/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MidoriReallyMidori
Creative Living Coaching and Private Sexological Consultations: ask@planetmidori.com
By Midori
www.planetmidori.com
An exercise in sequence. This is not a speed drill. It’s better if you slow down and notice the process. Take your leisurely time.
You will need:
- Minimum 2 people
- Laced tennis shoes or similar for both
- Kitchen tongs, 2 pairs
- For extra challenge: chopsticks, 2 pairs
- Comfortable seating
- Really long shoelaces
1. Solo:
- Put on your shoes and tie your laces as you usually do.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
2. Solo:
- Using two pairs of tongs (or chopsticks), one set in each hand, tie your shoelaces.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
3. Pair:
- Have partner tie your laces.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
4. Pair:
- For this, give no verbal adjustments or instructions during the tying. Using your dominant hand and their dominant hand, each hand holding one of the shoelace ends, tie your laces collaboratively.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
5. Pair:
- Again, give no verbal adjustments or instructions during the tying. Using your non-dominant hand and their non-dominant hand, each hand holding one of the shoelace ends, tie your laces collaboratively.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
6. Solo:
- Close your eyes. Using both your own hands, tie your laces.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
7. Pair:
- Tie the other’s shoelaces while looking at their face, preferably while having a conversation about something unrelated. (Suggestions: what did you have for breakfast? Talk about your favorite sports, games, or movie. Ask the other what they like about rope bondage. Etc.)
** Optional: Are you doing this with someone you’re intimate with? Do this step while making out.
** Optional: Person tying is blindfolded.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
8. Pair:
- You are tying your partner’s shoes. The receiving partner must tell you exactly, utterly precisely, what you are to do. Do not look at their shoes or your hands. Look at them or close your eyes. They will explain the minutiae as clearly as possible. For example, “with each hand, pick up each end of the shoelaces/stop moving/pull with both hands/stop/pull harder (or slower or…)” etc. Follow their input and feedback exactly. If their description, instruction, and communication is vague or assumes you understand, ask for them to rephrase.
** This last step is not about dominance or submission. This sharpens communication skills, tactile awareness, and mutuality of responsibilities for both parties in preparation for play.
** Optional: On the other hand, the two of you can choose to make this about dominance and submission.
** Optional: Person tying is blindfolded.
- Loosen laces and fully remove shoes.
- Put shoes back on with laces loose.
For many of my rope classes, the prerequisite skill list includes “be able to tie your shoelaces.” People think I’m just being goofy or trite. Goofy? Yes, because this is all about play and joy – which is ultimately a very serious matter. Trite? No. The art of tying one’s shoes is actually a very complex set of skills. If you’ve taught a child how to tie shoes, you know. Hands must move in bilateral mirror image. Fingers move in small precise movements as the hands move on a slightly larger scale. The foot must sense for the right tightness with hands responding and adjusting simultaneously. All the while there is a three-dimensional model in the brain of what’s happening and what needs to happen. The fingers and hands need to adjust tension as needed. When the linguistic parts of the brain are engaged, another layer of information to process is added – perhaps you’re listening to verbal instructions, or silently talking oneself through the procedure. For people who experience challenges or frustration with words-to-action, they know this complexity very well. The same for people with challenges around dexterity, mobility limitations, and visualization-to-movement translation. They know well already that this “simple” skill is hardly simple.
As you go through the shoelace steps, slow down and notice the minute and layered process needed. Notice the movement of your hands, fingers, arms, and even your body and spine relative to the laces.
Then, can you make your movements more fluid? More efficient? More dramatic? Gentler? Rougher? Sexier? Creepier? Subtler? Funnier?
What if you removed the shoe and used very long laces on the bare foot? Criss-cross wrap around the foot instead of using the holes in the shoes.
Pay attention. Try the moods listed above.
What if you did this on the bare leg up to the knee?
Try both feet and legs together.
Finish it off with a nice bow!
----
Art by Nadia Vanilla www.nadiavanilla.com
Nadia Vanilla is an award-winning Phoenix-based erotic artist. She paints people of all walks of life, doing all sorts of fun things with their bodies. She aims to celebrate the human experience, in all its messy, colorful beauty.
She uses a variety of media to achieve this – lately, that includes digital painting and drawing, soft pastels, acrylic paints, watercolors, and ink.
----
Midori's Bio
Trailblazing educator, sexologist, artist, and irritant to banality, Midori founded Rope Dojo and ForteFemme: Women's Dominance Intensive. She penned the first English instruction book on Shibari titled, "Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage" in 2001, paving the way to the popularity of rope. Dan Savage calls her the "Super Nova of Kink," while others affectionately call her Auntie Midori for her cool, tell-it-like-it-is, funny, reality-based teaching. She is also the author of "Wild Side Sex," "Master Han's Daughter," and "Silk Threads.”
During this pandemic, learn, laugh and enjoy her special online classes, events and art at www.patreon.com/PlanetMidori
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/planetmidori/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MidoriReallyMidori
Creative Living Coaching and Private Sexological Consultations: ask@planetmidori.com
Also in News
Exotic Bamboo Rope Review by Pete Riggs of Ropeconnections.com
Pete Riggs of Ropeconnections.com recently did a very through and in depth review of our exotic bamboo ropes, including washing! Check it out, along with tons of other great rope content and tutorials!
